The Virginia Tech Shooting Blogstravaganza - Part 2 - 'Cho: The Softer Side'

Oh Cho. Even when you dress up like a tough guy, you still look like a MySpace emo.



Ok, that mightn't be the original picture ('faggot' was misspelt in the original), but you get the idea. This dude was straight-up weird. He dresses up as Tomb Raider, and doesn't even include the giant tits. And apparently, Cho's 'Hammer-Time' pose is straight from a South Korean movie called 'Oldboy' in English, or 'I Can't Read Gook' in Korean.



But those pictures, the... manifesto of the madman, the portfolio of the psychotic, the.... gallery of the......gaybo aren't the real Cho. The real Cho isn't a bloodthirsty killer, he's an artist. He's a visionary.


He's a playwright.


I give you Cho's screenplay, 'Richard McBeef'. Richard McBeef tells a coming-of-age story about a boy named John, his mother, and his step-dad, the unfortunately named Richard McBeef. Basically, the gimmick is that John hates Richard, calls him all sorts of shit, then Richard snaps and everything goes to hell.

Cho style.

Along with some of Cho's other writings, McBeef's graphic violence saw his teachers recommend Cho for psychological evaluation. Also, this dialogue probably had something to do with it.

JOHN
You ain't my dad and you know it, you Dick.

RICHARD
Come on John. Sit down. We need to have a man-to-man talk.

JOHN
Man-to-man up your ass, bud!

'To be or not to be', 'If you prick me, do I not bleed?' and now... 'Man-to man up your ass, bud!'.

Of course, that's not the best stuff in McBeef. Take the high-drama action scenes, for example.



Richard McBeef, while a useful insight into the violent, disturbed mind of a killer, pales in comparison to Cho's second opus - Mr. Brownstone. Mr. Brownstone is set in a Casino, and...well, is basically just a bunch of kids bitching about their teacher and how they want to murder him.

The first thing that strikes you about Mr. Brownstone is the unique character names.



Seriously, considering your name is Chode Feng Shui, we're going to expect better names for your sicko screenplay fantasies than 'Joe'.

More importantly, did Cho proof-read any of this? Maybe that was his problem. He didn't proofread. A quick second-look at a paragraph like, oh, I dunno, this one about taking a massive shit, and maybe Cho might have realised he was fucked up before he went all Counter-Strike on a college campus.


Rrrrrigghht.


Here's an idea Cho, if you're reading this in some parallel past universe - spare us all the trouble and get yourself a fucking blog.