tommyiscooldotcom

Thought I'd make a post about the Chinese diplomat Chen Yonglin who tried to get political asylum in Australia, because it's actually kind of interesting. I'll let ABC News tell you the important bits:

Downer can grant defector political asylum: lawyer

An immigration lawyer says Foreign Affairs Minister Alexander Downer has the power to grant Chinese diplomat Chen Yonglin political asylum.

Mr Chen says the Immigration Department rejected his application for political asylum, advising him instead to apply for a protection visa.

He has been in hiding, fearing retributions from the Chinese Government, since he defected from his senior post at the Chinese Consulate in Sydney more than a week ago.

He claims his Government has up to 1,000 spies operating in Australia who have been kidnapping Chinese nationals.

http://www.abc.net.au/news/newsitems/200506/s1385007.htm

One THOUSAND Chinese spies in Australia! Sure, half of them are at Sydney Uni doing Actuary degrees, but that's still 500 spies lurking around, keeping tabs on Chinese ex-pats and doing maths homework. The number shocked me so much in fact, that I thought I'd do a little digging around with my contacts in Sydney, and you won't believe what I found.

I have, in my posession, the names of three of the Chinese spies. Sure, I can't pronounce them, but that doesn't matter because it's the INTERNET BABY.

The names are as folloSDKFFLKJDSKFD
DFKMCHERLPOH JESU

SOMEBFODY DINSIDETHEOSUE

THEPHONECALIEISCOMEINGAROFMRINSIDETHEOUSE

HELP
HH



Herro. This is Tommy. I no ronger have names of Chinese spies because there are no Chinese spies. The glorious motherrand has no need for such Western inventions. China is a greaming beacon for the workers of the world, with absolutely no prans to develop nucrear weapons nor to invade Taiwan any time soon. Chinese President Hu Jintao has a massive schrong. It is ridicrously huge. You can trust me because I am Tommy and not a Chinese information anaryst who has knocked him out with a kung-fu chop because all Asians know kung-fu it's science.


Love,


Xhang Ng- Tommy.