Tommy's Logies Wrap-Up

During Sunday Night's Logie Awards telecast, Tommy took some time off from watching the fat chick get voted off Big Brother to record his thoughts.

Events occur in real time.

IT'S A LOGIE LOGO!@# LOLGIE!!

Adam Hills is just Wil Anderson minus the drugs. In fact, he's so much like Wil Anderson I'm surprised he doesn't spell his name 'Ada'. 30% of you got that.

Izzy from Neighbours said, and I quote, 'You know, watching the nominees for this category, I found it surprising that the Light-Entertainment category had so many heavyweights'. And she didn't shoot herself afterwards.

Rove just won for Most Popular Light-Entertainment. All the people who watch his show must have voted twice or something. Yeah, that must be how he got the 2000 votes required to win.

Maybelline New York must have paid a lot of cash, even the guy from the ABC is plugging it. It's only a matter of time before Kerry O'Brien starts doing ads for erectile disfunction.

Dave Hughes is funny, but he has a chip in his front tooth you could drive Bert Newton's head through and oh fuck Bindi Irwin just came out.

SHE'S READING OFF CARDS

oh god she's so fake

SHE'S DOING THAT THING WHERE YOU RUN YOUR FINGER ALONE THE BOTTOM OF THE LINE

And she has her own TV show. Not even Glen Robbins can save this. Or can he?


Nope.


Hey, this blog needs a picture, and I'd put one of Bindi Irwin but her eyes scare me. So here's Nicky Whelan from Neighbours.




Hey, the Umbilicle Brothers have a kids show. Wicked. They won for Most Outstanding Kids show, and... they're not very funny when they're not doing sound effects. It's like two white Michael Winslows. Ooo, their producer has a freaky red mark on his head, Gorbachev style. Yet no close-up.

Avril Lavigne is performing. I might take a break.

Ok, turns out that break was a little longer than I expected. I come back, and we're already on to the dead people montage. All the obvious ones - Belinda Emmett, Billy Thorpe, Steve Irwin, Ian Thorpe's career, Richard Carleton. Nice montage, but a little harsh if you're Rove watching that. Poor guy. Let's give him a Gold Logie because his wife died.

Damn, I was hoping we went from the dead montage to a really inappropriate ad, but they did a nice, respectful ad for RPA and that Safari kid with the mongy lip.

And who gets to follow the dead montage? Ah. The token American. Michael whatshisface from NCIS. Remember when they had actual stars at The Logies? Like Muhammed Ali? John Wayne? Joey from Friends? Andrew Daddo? Now who do we get? The second fiddle from NCIS. What, they couldn't afford Mark Harmon's asking price?




Hey, Love My Way won for Most Outstanding Drama. All the people that watch that show must have voted twice or someth- already done that one? How about 'It's pretentious shit'? Cool.

They should cut to the Neighbour's girls table more often.

Oh shit, it's Tracy Grimshaw. I'm taking another break.

Apparently Andy of Hamish and Andy is banging Megan Gale. I wonder who Hamish bangs?

Hmmm.....




(That's Andy)

(You should really watch more TV)


Just hurry up and give out the gold Logie to Rove already. This blog is too long. I'm not going to type any more until the Gold Logie unless something hilarious happens.

James Morrison looks like Chris Martin if he was a rat.



I mean, of course, the British singer, not the actor who plays Bill Buchanan on 24. He could kick the shit out of this James Morrison. And then he'd brief the President about it at the start of the episode because thats the only way you can understand 24's plots.



...... Oh god it's still going.


Screw this, the Logies are too long. I'm just going to assume Rove's pulled a Ray Martin and won another fucking Gold Logie. Congratulations Rove. Sally from Home and Away