Like a good journo, I am obligated to present both sides of arguments (unless it's bagging out Wil Anderson). Therefore, I give you the following guest blog by the richest 21 year-old I know, Whymsy.
Note: Like most conservatives, Whyms lacks a funny bone (and a soul). Therefore, I have taken the liberty of bringing the funny with my trademark, hilarious captions.
Note: Tommy makes no guarantee in regards to the hilarity of the captions
So, without further ado, let this guest blog take you on a journey into the dark, depraved depths of....
The Hypocrisies of the Labor Party
A guest blog
For the 10% of the readership of TommyIsCool.com that don't know me, my name is Whymsy. I am not a Greenpeace tree hugging hippy, and I am not a Labor supporter. I fit somewhere in between, and I support sound financial economic management. So, I must be a Liberal Supporter. I am the Ying to Tommy's Yang, I am the voice of reason, and the voice of sanity to Tommy when he comes out with some outlandish shit like "Mark Latham should be the Prime Minister of Australia."
Vampire Latham Disagrees
As some of you may know, last Wednesday the Federal Reserve Bank of Australia lifted the official cash interest rate to 6.00%, and the hypocrisy that has been bantered around the media is incredible. I feel it is my duty as the resident TommyIsCool.com financial analyst to post this report.
Hypocrisy #1:
NSW Premier Morris Iemma made quite a few comments in the media stating that Peter Costello should influence and sway the Reserve Bank's decision to raise interest rates. Now, for those of us who have an idea about politics and what goes on in the running of our country, we know back when Paul Keating was Prime Minister of this great nation he seperated any ties the government had with the Reserve Bank for matters that I will touch on later. So how Costello could have done anything is beyond my understanding, and just the whinging of a Premier who has NFI.
My government's position is clear - we do whatever The Daily Telegraph says to do
What the people of NSW should really be concerned about is the fact that our Premier is looking for excuses and other people to blame when in fact NSW has been ridden into a state of complete disrepair by possibly the biggest joke of a Premier we have ever had. I bring before you Bob Carr. Now whilst Bob Carr had a sense of humour, took bets with QLD around State of Origin time and sounded like he had the voice of a man with three testicles, his poor management of our state over a ten-year period is just too depressing and too long to list here on this blog. Transport, health care and the sheer weight of bullshit taxes are just a few glaring problems we have in this state.
I sold the lease on my third testicle to Macquarie Bank
Hypocrisy #2:
Federal Opposition Leader Kim Beazley is having a whinge that the Liberal Goverment promised to keep interest rates low, and that 6.00% is just too high for Australians to live the lifestyles they want! If there was a way I could tell you how angry I am and how much of an idiot I think Kim Beazley is, I would do it. The Liberal Goverment cannot directly effect interest rates,but they have indirectly kept interest rates low for a long period of time through sound economic and financial management.
If Kim was in charge of this fine country of ours, even with just one new fuel law that he wants to pass, the average families fuel bill would go up to $210 per week and put far more pressure on inflation than what there is now, and according to analysts, send our interest rates up to around the 10.5% mark.
Now how is that going to support the Australian lifestyle?
Coincidentally, Kim Beazley's second and third chins can support the Australian lifestyle for another two decades
What good ol' Kim also fails to mention is that - before a lot of you kids may remember - Labor were actually our federal government at one time. Back in the late eighties and early nineties we were led by the honourable (ha) Paul Keating. As I mentioned earlier, he seperated the Reserve Bank from the government, he did this to take pressure off himself as interest rates climbed to an all time high of 18% (22% for business) during the recession that "We had to have".
Now if memory serves me correct Kim Beazley was the Treasurer during this period of time in the early nineties, so his recollection of this should be very clear.
I hope all who have read this will be more the wiser.
Your friendly Tommyiscool.com financial analyst,
Whymsy
(Paid for by the Liberal Party, Canberra.)
9 comments:
*votes liberal*
vote goat
maybe next time you could just scan the liberal party pamphlet it came from
there's no denying the facts now is there?
well, if the facts are
- paul keating made the reserve bank independent to 'take the pressure off' him for the interest rate rises
- kim beazley's secret policy to raise fuel bills to $210 a week, unsupported by any evidence or even links to analysts 10.5% interest rate claim
- bob carr having 3 testes
and if we're ignoring
- the massive effect the international economy has on interest rates
- the liberal party's claims they would keep interest rates 'at record lows', when australia has the 2nd highest rates in the industrialised world, where rates have risen four consecutive times and where they have spent surplus after surplus from the resources boom on middle class, vote-buying welfare instead of solving the skills crisis and investing in infrastructure
- basic economics
then it's pretty hard to argue with them. i mean, they're so factual
it also ignores the simple fact that politics is politics. every politician is hypocritical. labor attacking libs over interest rate rises is no different to libs attacking labor over health care, or public education. it's how politics works, and to selectively blast one party for it is ridiculous.
You sound as though you know what you are talking about, but in fact you proved my point.
"- when australia has the 2nd highest rates in the industrialised world,"
Why do countries drop interest rates (to less than 1% in the US)? To stimulate consumer confidence? To stimulate spending in a massive economic downturn?
When we have witnessed one of the biggest housing booms in our lifetime, a strong economy producing a surplus every year, virtually zero foreign debt. Why would we have needed interest rates below 3 or 4%? When in fact in a strong economy ridiculousy low interest rates would have had a detremental effect on our economy. This proves that we have had a stable economy for many years now.
"- where they have spent surplus after surplus from the resources boom on middle class"
I agree with you that the money could have been spent better elsewhere, but at least this government has produced consecutive surplus' (which is something that labor run states would have a hard time announcing) and reduced our foreign debt down to virutally nothing after it got to almost the 300bn mark with the previous labor government!
my point wasn't that interest rates should be lower, my point was that the liberal party promised to keep interest rates 'at record lows' (later changed to 'lower' once interest rates rose), and failed. they lied. they manipulated the australian public into believing they had a magical power over interest rate fluctuations, then blamed everyone but themselves when rates were risen. you take the good with the bad.
your argument seems to revolve around blaming labor for everything. you accept my point about the waste of the surplus, then have a go at labor state governments. you gloss over the lib's promise to keep rates at record lows, then have a go at paul keating. you ignore the massive inflation inherited by the hawke government from treasurer howard (hint: that treasurer might know something about 17.5% interest rates too).
you also ignore that the steps taken by keating and hawke, their neo-liberalism, was SUPPORTED by the liberal party. especially john howard. floating the dollar, the accord, deregulating the rba - they had bipartisan support. if you look at politics like a fight, you only ever see half the picture.
and you still haven't given any supporting evidence to your beazley petrol tax claim, or explained how paul keating gave RBA independence to 'take pressure off him' for high interest rates. at any time keating could have pressured the RBA to lower interest rates faster, he had that power. if he wanted to take the pressure off himself, he would have done that, not given the RBA MORE independence.
whyms, i miss your balls
Who cares about the blog...Tommy's captions made me pee!
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