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There are laws against defamation and slander in Australia, and I have no idea if what I say on my blog can get me sued. As I like my bank account how it is, I'm going to walk on the safe side. Keeping that in mind, I present to you today's blog:

JANA PITTMAN IS NOT A STUPID BITCH

I really don't like athletics. I mean, I cheered for Cathy Freeman and bitched quietly to my friends about an Abo lighting the Olympic torch like every Australian, but I've never really cared. Just like Matt Shirvington's massive package, I could never quite get my head around the idea that these runners, jumpers and walkers were something to be paraded around as modern-day gods (especially because most of them are juiced up on more steroids than Triple H).

And then Jana Pittman went psycho.

Uh oh I poopy my pants

Jana milking her injury for all the publicity she could get during the Olympics, only to let down the nation by coming 5th. Jana firing up at the much, much, much hotter Tamsyn Lewis after Tamsyn said she calls Jana a 'bitch' in her head on the starting blocks. Jana getting engaged twice before the age of 25. Jana attacking the media for attacking her because she's not a dopey whore. She was the anti-Cathy. The golden girl turned bad. The baddy of athletics. The dumb intelligent ugly attractive slut slut.

And to make things better, she lived near me! So I was access to all sorts of nasty rumours about her, like how she went over to one of my friend's houses when she was about twelve and said she wanted 'blonde pubes like her Mum'. Yes, that's a fucking exclusive. You heard it here first. Jana Pittman's mum has blonde pubes.

So Jana, the whole country might think you're not an overrated tool who needs to shut her steel-filled mouth before she gets deported, but at least you're entertaining. Good luck in whatever event you compete in, you dumb bitch.



Shit.